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If life is not always poetical, it is at least metrical. Periodicity
rules over the mental experience of man, according to the path of the
orbit of his thoughts. Distances are not gauged, ellipses not measured,
velocities not ascertained, times not known. Nevertheless, the recurrence
is sure.
What the mind suffered last week, or last year, it does not suffer now;
but it will suffer again next week or next year. Happiness is not a matter
of events; it depends upon the tides of the mind. Disease is metrical,
closing in at shorter and shorter periods towards death, sweeping abroad
at longer and longer intervals towards recovery. Sorrow for one cause
was intolerable yesterday, and will be intolerable to-morrow; to-day it
is easy to bear, but the cause has not passed.
Even the burden of a spiritual distress unsolved is bound to leave the
heart to a temporary peace; and remorse itself does not remain
it returns. Gaiety takes us by a dear surprise. If we had made a course
of notes of its visits, we might have been on the watch, and would have
had an expectation instead of a discovery. No one makes such observations;
in all the diaries of students of the interior world, there have never
come to light the records of the Kepler of such cycles.
But Thomas à Kempis knew of the recurrences, if he did not measure
them. In his cell alone with the elements What wouldst thou
more than these? for out of these were all things made he
learnt the stay to be found in the depth of the hour of bitterness, and
the remembrance that restrains the soul at the coming of the moment of
delight, giving it a more conscious welcome, but presaging for it an inexorable
flight.
And rarely, rarely comest thou, sighed Shelley, not to Delight
merely, but to the Spirit of Delight. Delight can be compelled beforehand,
called, and constrained to our service Ariel can be bound to a
daily task; but such artificial violence throws life out of metre, and
it is not the spirit that is thus compelled. That flits upon
an orbit elliptically or parabolically or hyperbolically curved, keeping
no man knows what trysts with Time.
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Alice Meynell (1847-1922)
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from The
Rhythm of Life in Essays (1914) |
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